I Choose Henry
by PirateOwl
Summary: A response to this prompt on Tumblr: "Killian has to choose between saving Emma and saving Henry. How does he react?"
"So what will it be, captain? The mother or her son? One of them will stay here forever, a tormented husk to add to my collection. And you get to choose who." Hades vanishes in a flash of blue fire.

Last time, it was easy to refuse when Hades gave him an ultimatum. It was him who would suffer the consequences if he refused. But this time it is Emma or Henry. Hades assures him he can only save one of them, only spare one of them the torments of the River of Lost Souls.

Killian scrambles to his feet and starts to run, hoping against hope that he will have time to save both, or that he will encounter one of the rest of her family who can save the other. He remembers Neverland as he runs, telling Emma she had to make a choice. I choose Henry, she had said, with absolute conviction. And so will he.

Henry is chained to the ceiling the way he had been, although he appears to be in good health other than that. A mixture of relief and terror rushes through Killian because he knows he will have time to save Henry, but if Emma is this close to the water too there is no way he can save them both.

He catches Henry and settles him on the metal grate. "Easy there, Henry, I've got you. Hold still so I can get you free."

He feels it the moment Emma hits the water. The sudden pain jarring him from picking the lock on Henry's chains, sudden certainty that she was gone.

"What is it?" Henry asks. Then his face falls. "It's Mom, isn't it?"

"Aye," Killian says, not trusting his voice with more than that. He is still working on the lock for something to do, but he can barely see it through a blur of tears. "He… Hades… had both of you. There wasn't time."

"Why did you pick me?" Henry asks in a small voice as Killian gets the lock open. "She's your true love."

"Aye. And if I could have talked to her, she'd have picked you. You know she would have. So I was picking her. And Henry, if I could trade places with her…"

Henry cuts him off by throwing his arms around him in a fierce hug. He wraps his arms around Henry too. He wants to be strong for Henry but he can't, not now, not without her, so he allows himself a moment lost in his grief. It's just him and Henry, leaning on each other for strength as they grieve for their true love.

"What's wrong?" Snow asks when they make it make to the relative safety of the loft. It would be hard to miss their tearstained faces.

"Where's Emma?" David asks.

Killian forces himself to tell the story again, his voice breaking. To his surprise, Snow hugs him. He's surprised they aren't angry at him. They should be. They should be as angry with him as he is with himself. Not for saving Henry. If it had to come down to that choice, he knows he made the right one. But she was here to save him. That made it his fault but not one person acts like they blame him at all.

The rest of the day passes in a terrible blur and he finds himself wandering down to the graveyard once everyone else is in bed. He stops in front of her cracked headstone and sinks to his knees in front of it.

He looks up a while later, surprised to find Regina standing nearby.

"No one goes out alone," she says, by way of explanation. "We aren't losing anyone else."

He doesn't argue. He isn't sure he's worth saving, but Emma was sure.

"At least help me get her out of the river," Killian says finally.

"It's too late," she says, not unkindly.

"I know that," Killian says. "But if it were Robin, you wouldn't be able to just leavehim there."

She is silent for a long moment, perhaps really given thought to that possibility.

"No, I wouldn't," she says finally. "I'll help, if only so you can say your goodbyes. Although I'm not sure what good it will do."

"It won't," Killian admits in a broken voice. "But I can't leave her."

He finds her, drifting in the river, lost with the other aimless souls. There is a keening sound rising from the river, a sound of torment that cuts Killian heart like knives.

Regina has no difficulty lifting Emma out of the river using magic, but it makes no difference in her translucent form. Killian rushes to her side, dropping down beside her on the rocky ground.

"I'll…" Regina starts. She sounds on the verge of tears herself, but Killian doesn't look up. "I'll keep guard while you say goodbye."

"Emma," Killian whispers. "Oh, Emma, Emma, Emma," the name a prayer and a lament. She doesn't react, still making the same terrible keening sound as the rest of the lost souls. "Emma," he whispers again. "Can you hear me? I saved Henry," he says. "I hope you know… that he's alright… that I'll get him back to Storybrooke… that I won't let him be lost. I promise."

He presses his head against her nearly insubstantial shoulder, tears flowing unchecked. "I'm so sorry, Emma. You were only here for me. And I know you. I know you would tell me that I need to forgive myself for that, and I'll try. I promise I'll try." Silence reigns for a while, broken only by Killian's sobs and the keening of the lost souls, the sounds of two kinds of torment.

"For all the times recently that I told you you had to let me go… now that I have to… Emma, I don't know how." He presses his lips gently to hers.

He feels rather than sees the buildup of magic, releasing in a wave from the two of them, feels her lips move against his. He opens his eyes and it's Emma, not ghostly Emma, real, living Emma lying on the stones.

"You're alive" he says, laughing in relief.

"Thank you, Killian," she says, a smile lighting up her face.

"I couldn't just leave you."

"No. Well. Yes, for that too," she says with a laugh. "But I meant for choosing Henry."

"Of course, Emma," he says seriously. "It wasn't even a question."

"I know. You doing good things doesn't surprise me," she says with a broader smile.

"If you two are quite done canoodling," a stranger's voice says.

"I don't think I've ever canoodled in my life," Emma objects with a grin.

"I'm not sure what it is, but it sounds worth a try," Killian adds. He is still laughing, more from relief and sheer joy at having Emma back than from actual humor.

Killian very carefully peers over the edge of the river to see a bunch of people treading water. Probably dead people, but not husks. Regina heads back into the cavern.

"I think you two just broke the Underworld," Regina says dryly, returning to the cavern, but there is a smile dancing in her eyes. "I'm glad you aren't dead." She looks down at the river full of random swimmers. "Get her back to the loft, let Henry and everyone know she's alright. I'll sort out…" she waves a hand at the river.

"Thank you," Emma says.

"And when I run across any old friends, I'll send them to say hello," Regina promises.

Killian gives her a nod of gratitude before taking Emma's arm and heading back to the loft.

"Okay, I've never gotten to do this before," Emma says. "I mean, I've never been dead. I've never even had people think I was dead. What do I say? 'Good news. I have an awesome boyfriend,'? Actually, that works."

"How should I bloody know?" he asks with a grin. "I'm not exactly the expert."

"You've died three times. I think that does make you the expert."

"You make a good point. I think I should get to do it, seeing as I had to break the news the other direction."

"Oh, right.

They open the door to the loft and are surprised to see the family standing right inside the door, looking about ready to leave.

"Told you!" Henry says, launching himself and nearly tackling Emma with a hug.

"We weren't really sleeping," Snow says, she and David joining in the hug. "So we saw the wave of magic."

Killian stands to one side, smiling as he watches Emma reunited with her family.

"You brought her home," David says, looking up.

"Aye," Killian says, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck.

"Does that surprise you?" Henry asks. "It's kinda what he does."

"Well…" Snow says with a smile. "The river full of dead people gave us pause."

David laughs and pulls Killian into the family hug.


End file.
